As we go through life we are imprinted by events and people on the expectations on how something or someone is supposed to act. These perceived actions are based in past experiences but, not typically in reality. We come to understand what will happen from by what things has happened in the past or in a fantasized reality. There are too many variables in the moment that changes the perceived reality from our past. We must understand the situation, the person, and the event to truly know what is happening in the current moment. The assumption of what will happen is not based in the current moment. To truly understand what is happening in your world we must dig a little deeper into how we can understand better. When we understand the moment then we can make rationale decision, not biased on the past. When we can do this, we free our mind of the attachment to the event and able to move forward in our lives. To get to where our minds are free to understand, we must get to know our assumptions and where they are based, we must seek to understand before being understood, and then we must understand ourselves. When we can master these practices, it is then we will understand and be heard.
Assumptions are the opposite of understanding. When we assume we predetermine the outcome in our heads based on those past experiences or fantasies. It is like when the person on the highway cuts you off as they speed down the road. What is your first thought, “What a jerk!”,” He’s doing that just to be mean!”. But do you know for sure? What if the guy is late to a job and might get fired? What if a loved one is in the hospital? Doesn’t that change the narrative of what your thoughts were? Assumptions are us determining who people are and what is the root cause of their actions. Truth is we don’t know because we are not those people. They have their own agendas and biases. We can only know who we are and sometimes that is even hard. People are all different and situations have too many variables to be lumped in the same categories. When we take away the assumptions by asking questions and changing the narrative, we find that we get a better positive understand of what is going on. Even if we do not connect with the answers, we still are in a better understanding. Understanding the moment can be more powerful than assumption of past expectations. When we understand we open up more communication so that the people can hear us clearer.
As we evolve to remove the assumptions and open up communication better, we will be able to be heard. First seek to understand before being understood. Once we come to the moment and remove the past, we can see more clearly why we are in the moment. This opens up more of an opportunity to forgive ourselves and others. Even if we do not connect to why, we still come from a place of understanding. This understanding will free you to forgiveness. Forgiveness will not let you hold on to what has happened. You can let it go and move your life more freely forward. Holding on to the past keeps you stuck in the moments that generate your assumptions. When you can hear and see, in the moment where the person is they will hear you more. Assumptions are barriers that we put up for protection but, they are barriers of understanding and forgiveness as well. If you are open minded to see where someone is then they can communicate more openly. Holding no attachment or predetermined outcomes will help you let it go and move on. When you can remove the assumptions and try to understand the other person you will be able to forgive and not hold on to the moment. By doing this you will be able to move on without building more chains to holding you to the past. This is liberating but, hard to do because we have been hurt. But like assumptions, hurt can hold us in the past as well. Understanding ourselves and where the hurt is based will not hold us to the past as well.
We sometimes have assumptions of ourselves. If we can understand our true power, we can have a better view of our potential. There may have been times where you told yourself, “I can’t do that”, without even looking at what it was first. This is when your own preconceived assumptions started talking to you. I can’t do that because, I am not smart enough, I am not strong enough, I not good enough. You have stopped yourself even before you began. Your own assumptions of your capabilities got in your way. Those voices are the ones you were taught and not based in reality. In reality you are capable. Assumptions of yourself are the imprinting of the past people and events that occurred. They are not based in the current moment. Understand you are more powerful than you think you are. It always amazes the power that people have when they let go of their past assumptions. When the voices of doubt question your capabilities, you should take a moment to understand where the voices are based. Are they passed whispers? Silence the storm of assumption by, saying I am capable and worthy of anything in this moment. Then watch the shift to a more obtainable future with not chains pulling you to the past. Understand yourself without the rose-colored glasses on and see your potential.
Understanding is a key factor to growth. It removes the assumptions, it opens up communication, gives us the ability to forgive and lets us see our true potential. When we can truly understand others and ourselves, we cannot hold attachment to the past. It removes the roadblocks to us moving forward in our lives. So, when that person cuts you off on the highway again say, “I hope they are ok and I pray for them.” Then you can let go of the thought. You have no attachment, and you are not in a negative place to hold you in that moment. Understanding helps you grow to the best future you, you can be.